Why does it seem to be such a fine line between the extremes of what brings me great joy or incredible anger?

The Art of Traffic’ing

Take traffic for example.

You want to bring me deep joy? Offer me a space in front of you when i am trying to make my way into a busy road. Or even just wave a thank you or flash your lights at me when i have made room for you.

Want to make me mad? Drive five cars past me in the middle lane and then push your way into the left-turn-only lane because you didn’t have the patience to wait for everyone else to turn left like the rest of us. When i see that [unless you’re a taxi driver cos i understand some of the ramifications of how things work for you there] it makes me want to go Mad Max on your ass.

i mean not really, but kind of. Well, kind of a lot!

extreme traffic response

Get your butt out of here.

Want to make me lose it? Let me see you dropping a cigarette butt out of your car window [which happens ALL. THE. TIME. What is it with smokers and feeling the extreme privilege of dropping cigarette butts into the road?].

i mean littering in general makes me mad [because how hard is it to keep that thing in your hand or pocket for the next few hundred meters til you encounter a bin?] but for some reason the cigarette butts are litter times a thousand.

extremes of littering

Whereas the opposite creates such extremes in me. To be honest picking up your own litter is not really praiseworthy, but when i see people do it that brings me great joy. Witnessing someone stop to pick up someone else’s litter even more so. There is some element of praise due there, i guess, because you are doing what should be normal for everyone.

This feels like such an easy one. Just pick up your own crap, people!

How is it that someone’s quite simple actions – that in most cases they don’t even think about, because either way they come fairly naturally to them – can have such an extreme effect on me?

i’m driving behind someone and i see someone cut in and my mood is affected. i’m having a good day and i watch another lit cigarette butt fall to the floor and i’m suddenly angry…

extremes hulk

Take back your angry?

How do i give other people so much power over my emotions? 

Are you like this at all? What are some of the things that set you off? 

Because there are definitely things that require our anger – injustice, inequality, sexism and racism to name a few…

But these things feel so small and yet in some ways aren’t…

Can we work ourselves away from the extremes?

Is it possible to be both Challenging and Kind?

Be kind and things

Keep getting angry at the little things

‘Keep my anger turned towards Justice not Cruelty.’

i really like that line out of the mantra… and definitely i think our main focus needs to stay on the bigger issues and things which are tearing our country and world apart.

But, at the same time, i do believe there is a correlation between people who do the small things badly and getting the big things right. 

The bible has this idea of ‘Be Faithful in small things and you will be put in charge of big things’ although, let’s be honest, we see that in so many places around us.

i do want to suggest though, that if you are someone who cuts into traffic without considering someone else’s hurry, and if you are someone who throws cigarettes out of windows without thinking of the litter or possibility of fires, then you very likely are someone who also doesn’t care enough when it comes to more significant things.

i’ve seen it in my own life. When i let the little things slide, the big things are not far behind.

But when it comes to discipline, or cleanliness, or attitude, or love, when i can get it right and when i can do the work on the small things, then it feels so much easier when we head to the more important or significant extremes. The big things almost start to take care of themselves.

So let’s continue to let people into traffic, and let’s pick up other people’s trash [AND PICK UP YOUR OWN!!!] and be nicer on social media and work on being patient and gracious and kind and let’s create spaces for people to ask the really tough questions that they are wrestling with without condemning them directly to hell [because that act in itself might be the hell!] and let’s collectively believe that a better world is possible as we work to make it so around us! 

extremes of hope