Eckhart and Nicole Kidman in Rabbit Hole. The 42-year-old star of Rabbit Hole talked with West Coast editor Krista Smith about his frustrations with Hollywood, why no one will set him up on dates, and filming Hunter S. Thompson’s The Rum Diary with Johnny Depp. Highlights from their chat:

Krista Smith: So in Rabbit Hole, with all the heavy emotions, we got a little bit of Aaron Eckhart without his shirt on.

Aaron Eckhart: Oh boy.By the way, I forgot you’re a beefcake when you want to be.

Oh my goodness.

This role did not require it.

Aw, hideous! Hideous. It’s funny, because apparently there is a Web site of—I’m sure this is with all actors—they have a Web site of [me with my] shirt off. It’s just beastly. Anyway.

You did all right.

Let’s get to more important things.

With Rabbit Hole—how did it make its way to you?

It’s unclear whether my agent called me or Nicole [Kidman] called me out of the blue, but somehow I got the message that Nicole wanted to talk to me. And whenever that happens, I always get a little worried. Like, what did I do? So she called me up and said, “Listen, I’ve got this movie I’m producing, I’m passionate about it, would you please read it?” I read it and I thought, This is too good to be true. … I felt like [this could] be a crowning achievement in my career, because I knew that she was going to be so good in the movie.

You guys had never worked together before?

No. I’d only known Nicole—I think I did something socially with her one night with a bunch of people in New York. But I didn’t know her; I just was a fan of hers.

And did you guys actually live in that house?

[Director John Cameron Mitchell] slept overnight there—he slept in the little boy’s room—and Nicole and I commuted. But we had our dressing rooms next to each other, Nicole and I shared a bathroom, so it was a very intimate surrounding. You would hear everybody through the house at all times, so you really got this feeling like you were a family.

So when I first met you, you were working on Molly.

[Laughs.] Yes.

Right?

Now how can I take that out of your brain? How can I have your brain erased?

__Obviously, I should say that’s not true: I first met you through Neil LaBute—

Yes, thank you.

But I first put you in the magazine when you were in Molly. A great picture, I might add.__

I was a rising star.

Yes, a rising star! Do you find yourself now—is your rhythm kind of not having a rhythm at all?

I don’t know. You know, I—I feel happy, I guess, that I’ve been able to have the opportunities that I’ve had, but I feel also that maybe I haven’t worked the system well enough. And maybe I should concentrate on doing the same movie three times in a row, and making it more mainstream. I don’t know—it’s interesting because it’s a catch-22—you feel like you’re doing interesting roles, but on the other hand, you don’t mean anything to the bean counters. And if you can’t get on the covers of magazines, and they don’t know your name, then you’re not offered the movies that you really want to do. And you’re growing old as all this is happening, so I have very mixed feelings about it. There are movies out there that I want to do, that I’m just not able to do.

Because you don’t sort of move the needle, so to speak, overseas?

Yeah, it’s solely because of that. I’ve had top guys say it: “Aaron, I would put you in anything, but, you know, it’s my job to go out there and move that needle.” Between that and growing old, and I think my taste mellowing—I think that I need to start concentrating on more just pure-entertainment films. On the other hand, when Nicole calls you and she’s doing a small film that has a great story with a great pedigree, what am I supposed to do? Sit home and not do it?

No, of course you do it.

Yeah. The guys that I admire are going between big, small, and theater. I think my new resolution is [that] I’ve gotta get back to New York and I’ve gotta start doing more theater. Physically, I ride my bike every day, I surf, I have a good life, but I don’t feel like I’m being nursed enough here in Los Angeles. I’m an actor. I have to start being an actor again, and… I’m having the directing, you know, itch. So I feel like I have to be more of a participant in my industry—I feel like I’ve really taken a big vacation from my industry.

That’s interesting—that if you work every single lever of the machine, different things kind of come up.

I could have a much better career than I do right now if I were more of a people person. Those things just don’t come naturally to me. So I have to challenge myself more in those ways—I’m not happy with my career. I feel like I have much more to give, and I feel like I need to have more courage, and to get out there and take more chances.

Well, you seem pretty busy so far—and what’s happening with The Rum Diary [the adaptation of the Hunter S. Thompson novel, starring Johnny Depp]?

I don’t know. It’s supposed to come out this year, I don’t know what Johnny’s doing.

How was working with Johnny?

It was good. I’m a huge admirer of his. We had a lot of laughs—we had a good time making the movie.

Yeah, he’s a really interesting career trajectory. I mean, 21 Jumpstreet to… the last thing you think that would be a career changer for him, Pirates of the Caribbean. Suddenly he becomes this crazy movie star off of that franchise. Off of Jack Sparrow.

I think the key to that—and the thing I get from Johnny, and from anybody—is that they did it their own way. Instead of trying to please and mold yourself to the studios or to the system, you have to be yourself within the system.

Yeah, Johnny really does that.

He’s really cool, too.

Do you talk to Neil LaBute anymore?

Almost every day. And I e-mailed him yesterday and told him that I was hungry and depressed and—

[Laughs.]

—that I had re-devoted myself to him and I told him, I said to him, “Fucking write it. And let’s do it.”

Great!

Neil’s been so good to me. He always wants me to do his plays and stuff. And we’re going to do it the right way. We’re going to go back to the old LaBute. We’re gonna go scare some people.

He’s been dormant for a little bit, it feels like.

Yeah, well, he’s been doing other people’s stuff. He’s been writing a lot for the theater and directing. Hopefully we’re going to get a good, nasty one in there and write a good character for me. I told him to write an action movie, but he won’t do that.

You guys met in college, right?

Yeah.

Well, with Rabbit Hole, it may not be huge overseas—

[Laughs.] It might not even be huge domestically—

—but it’s huge in the 310 and the 212.

You know, I’m happy—I think I’m happy for Nicole. Again, we were talking about Johnny—look at Nicole.

How was she like as an actress, and then as a producer?

Well, she’s very good at faking that she’s not producing. I mean, she’s acting, but she’s also taking care of business at the same time. And she did it very gracefully. We knew that we all had her confidence and that we were all there together. I tease her all the time—I’d be like, “Nicole, who do I talk to about my trailer? You know, I need to talk to a producer—oh, you’re a producer! Well, my food, and I want my own bathroom and”—I teased her a lot about that stuff. If there was a problem, I’d say, “Nicole, get over there and take care of business. Go start yelling at somebody.”

So funny—I would imagine some of the levity was helpful because the subject matter was so intense.

Yes, there were a lot of tears. Think about it, it’s very heartbreaking.

Are you any closer to having children?

[Laughs.] I—I want the right circumstances. I would welcome it with open arms, but, um—I’m not sure I got the manual about how to get a woman and get some kids. I just can’t seem to get it right.

O.K.

It’s not that I don’t want it. It’s just—the right circumstances haven’t come up. Because I love kids, you know? I feel like a life lived without children is a life unfulfilled.

All right, well—

Someday. I’m working on it.

Well, keep working on it.

Nobody sets me up, man!

Really?

Yeah, because I’m a—

Are you a dark cloud?

Yeah, yeah, you know me from the days. I’m not an easy guy to get along with, and I’m a loner. Somebody’s gotta be out there.

Come on, Aaron! My dad used to always say, “For every pop, there’s a lid.”

Look, when I’m in an airport and I see some of the people together, I go—if they can do it, I can do it! [Laughs.]

Just keep going forward and good things come. They always do.

I threaten to quit all the time but my agent won’t let me.

Well, don’t do it.

Thank you.