Burnout, stress, work-life balance, bullying, miss-management, uncertainty, risk, pressure, fears, … and the list goes on – describing the portfolio of state-of-the-art consulting, research and blog posts. But they all share a negative connotation. Why is everybody focusing on the dark side and jumps into action only when the pain is already there? On many professional and private occasions, I have observed people who are more “vulnerable” to the above than others. Those who seem somewhat immune practice a state of mind that is hard to classify: It’s something between being calm, keeping their distance while engaging in constructive action, having a kind of lightness and oversight.

There are different words that could describe this mindset like being zen (but that’s a bit too relaxed), keep your calm (… and carry on, but this has a historical comprehension) or simply coolness (but that’s a bit too fashion and design). The German word gelassenheit, close to the English Composure, fits perfectly the meaning that I have in mind. It describes a dynamic serenity with which people react to the zeitgeist of complex organizations, omnipresent technologies and our environment. People with gelassenheit manage to stay engaged while letting go. They can integrate failure and external pressure with the necessary balance of self-confidence and attentiveness.

But now comes the chicken and egg question: Are we born with (or without) a certain level of gelassenheit or can we learn it? My personal conviction is that we can train it, just like we can train any of our muscles or our endurance. We have to understand how it works. We have to learn some exercises. And we have to practice. Each and every day.

Gelassenheit is composed by different mindsets: system-centered, focused seriousness, inner patience, managed expectations, physical balance, back-up thinking and a pinch of self-humor. In addition, organizations themselves can support and foster a culture of gelassenheit by implementing the right processes and tools.

System-centered is the opposite to self-centered. Too many people (unconsciously) are convinced that nothing would function (as smoothly) if they were not there. They have to be in every meeting, are stressed by the idea that they are not in the office, find it difficult to delegate and want to be consulted for each and every decision. They are destructively self-centred. System-centered people, on the other hand, continuously have the overall picture in mind. They give impulses to the system and contribute to sub-systems, but they do not pretend (and this is the relieving part) that the system would collapse if they were not there and are comfortable – in a solid self-confident manner – to go with the flow if necessary.

Gelassenheit is not about a laissez-faire attitude but getting out of the counterproductive seriousness in our society. Why is everybody focusing on the bad news, on problems and failures? Why can’t we focus more on what really matters and be more serious about “oneself”? Focused seriousness is exactly that: shifting the energy of the rat-race towards areas that really matter to you and others.

Remember the last time you felt impatient and in a hurry? We all face situations where we need to multi-task and keep a tight schedule – and we all have our individual triggers for impatience: specific events (“the social chit-chat before a meeting makes me nervous”), people (“he’s one of these slow talkers…”), phrases (“it might be a bit difficult to do this…”) or circumstances (“the line at the immigration office is endless!”). Flexing your inner patience is about learning more about these patterns and replacing them with more productive ones.

Give you and others a break! Many of the above-mentioned negative impacts are caused by exaggerated expectations we put on others and ourselves. In addition very often we want to please others by meeting the assumptions we hold about their expectations. Managing expectations on the right level will enable you to lower the pressure on yourself (versus expectations being too high) or maintain a constructive dynamic (versus expectations being too low).

I don’t want to quote Juvenal here, but it’s broadly accepted – and many of you already try to act upon it – that keeping a balanced mind strongly depends on your physical balance. The only worry I have is that I see more and more people engaging in competitive sports, trying to win or defeat themselves (the number of marathon runners in upper management is surprising!). This is (for many people) adding another destructive layer of “better, faster and more success”. True balance however is not just dependent on any physical activity. Your body should not pay the price for your everyday pressure. Real balance helps you alleviate it and goes along with the necessary relaxation for keeping a clear mind.

Even if Maslow is quite out-dated, the need for security is still widely shared and we tend to do everything to avoid disruption. One can do this by doing more of what they do now (and think they do best…), putting all their energy into holding on to what they have (which very often leads to back pain). Gelassenheit is based more on a continuous back-up thinking that gives you a plan-B scenario in each phase of your life, situation or decision.

Finally a little bit of self-humor helps to get over the rest of the stumbling…

Reinforcing your gelassenheit won’t work through the magic list of “10 things to do to master your gelassenheit”. It’s individual self-assessment, training and practicing plus a supportive organizational change that will allow you to strengthen this mindsetand regain some oversight on yourself and your environment.